I want to first start by apologizing to anyone who read my blog last night. I was in a pretty dark place and tend to go there. I need to learn to harness that stuff, turn it around and find the light. But in the middle of the darkness, it’s hard to see where you’re going. I always want to portray my true self in this forum. If someone can relate to my dark, then maybe it’s ok.
Today is better. I knew today was going to be better as I hit highway 34 on my way west to Lincoln. As I got on the road, the sun was slowly peaking and once the first hint of sunlight hit the purple sky, a feeling of warmth came over me. It is a new day. A day to put the dark behind, to make the day the best I can not only for me but for my family. Last night, I was sitting at the computer, pouting and drinking. Jack came right up to me and put his arms around me, slowly rubbing my back. I think that’s when my dark got a little less dark. He told his mom last night “I think daddy is really sad, but he loves me.”
That’s maybe what’s most important to me as a dad. I know I’m going to screw up. I’m going to fail my sons. But when they see me in my dark place, they know I still love them. I want them to know that I’ll always love them, no matter the current condition of my weak heart. My boys make me happy, when my skies are gray.
Today is a new day. It’s bright, beautiful, and a chance to live like gramps.
Coming Home 
Dark places are hard places to go, but they remind us of what’s important. It’s so easy to get caught up on things like our to do list or whatever else distracts us, that we forget the important people in our lives now. Admittedly, the post brought some tears to me eyes, but they were good tears. Thank you for sharing.